Opportunity:
People want to have the
convenience of enjoying their favorite drinks and listening/singing to their
favorite songs from the radio.
Solution:
KAJUKO, a portable
Bluetooth cooler device that you can roll to wherever the party is! The device
has a system that has a radio with Wi-Fi capabilities. The radio has a karaoke
feature and a mobile application. Along with that, the product can store up to
6 megabytes of music.
Feedback:
Most of the feedback from my last elevator pitch dealt with 90-second goal of the video. I hadn't realized that I went over about 15 seconds. People said that the pitch would have a gone better if I did a better job of delivering the speech without moving around in the frame. I thought that all the feedback was fair.
So, for this video, I worked on that. Despite having to go back home on the weekend that this assignment was due, I was able to get this pitch done in about 90 seconds and speak more fluidly.
Hey Brian, just wanted to start the comment by saying that I thought the information you conveyed in elevator pitch was clear. As for critique, I think that recording yourself standing in front of the camera rather than sitting would be better. That would be the only critique. Basically, the information was good and the video presentation could be improved by standing in the camera frame. However, you stated that your had to go back home on the weekend the assignment was due, so I understand that.
ReplyDeleteBrian,
ReplyDeleteI definitely agree with you when you say you spoke more fluidly, it felt very conversational. Overall, I think the video left we with a great understanding for your product. I noted that you often state "I'm looking into..." or "we're looking into" which is reasonable considering these features are all fictional. To make you sound more confident, I think you should instead say "I've created..." or "we've implemented...".
Brian,
ReplyDeleteI definitely agree with you when you say you spoke more fluidly, it felt very conversational. Overall, I think the video left we with a great understanding for your product. I noted that you often state "I'm looking into..." or "we're looking into" which is reasonable considering these features are all fictional. To make you sound more confident, I think you should instead say "I've created..." or "we've implemented...".
Brian, I thought you spoke much better in this video and you could easily tell that it was very fluid. Like Roy said, I think it would help you to stand up as if you were presenting on a stage to investors. Sometimes it can make it easier to present your ideas when you can talk with your hands and when we can see more of you in the frame.
ReplyDeleteBrian, I definitely think that you improved your pitch from the last time. It seemed like you were calmer and more collected than before. I still think your idea is one of the best and it is cool to see how your idea has developed. My only criticism is that it seemed a little long for an elevator pitch and was a little drawn out.
ReplyDeleteBrian,
ReplyDeleteThis pitch was good, voice was clear, you were calm, and explained your product adequately. I enjoyed all the ideas you proposed. You gave a bunch of information to help describe your product, but talking about warranties seems a little much for me. I am going to be sold on the product not on the warranty you provide. Cutting little things like that out may help you with time and be more concise with information. Overall, good job.
Brian, I commented on your pitch from last time also and I do believe this one is better content-wise. I like how you mentioned the major stores that you would be targeting for your product. I also liked how you mentioned that it would nt only be able to store cold drinks but also hot foods. I think that was a wide feature to add since this is a mobile food carrying device. The only thing I would work on is making it shorter and trying not to say "uhm" so many times.
ReplyDelete